To my sweet Eva Poppy,
I am sitting on my bed in the midst of magazines, a TV show playing on Netflix, my laptop open to my blog, my book club book, a cold coffee, an empty glass of wine and a carb loaded dinner.... smashed that after my attempt at exercising. Oh and I can see my study books calling me to fit in an hour of their time but I don't think I am that upset just yet.
I could fold some washing, clean the house or focus on one of the many activities surrounding me, but nothing is taking my mind off the fact that while you are sleeping soundly next door, your mumma is remembering like it was yesterday, your daddy handing you over to me and saying 'we have a girl.' I was so excited that you came along to even out our household of boy vs girl and you certainly made your mark from the moment you came into the world by letting the entire suburb know you were here and you meant business. When you weren't screaming down the house or through the mall so every parent with nothing better to do could judge me on what I was possibly doing the child, which by the way was running you to the nearest feeding room; you were smiling the biggest smiles, especially to your big brother. No one else really mattered to you when he was around.
Five years old and still sweet and petite as I often tell you. The amount of times you turned heads walking next to me in the shops or the park with your baby in the stroller because she was pretty much the size of you and reciting songs off the radio when no one really expected you to be able to say 'mamma'. Always in a hurry and always keeping busy with babies to wrap and put to bed, barbie doll hair to tangle, dress ups to be worn only five minutes at a time and ten thousand pictures of flowers and butterflies to draw and stick on the fridge. I feel like Jack napped for so many years possibly exhausted from watching you go about your day. But hey, you had places to go and people to see right? No one got away with passing you without having to be caught up in a conversation. I even feared for a elderly lady's life once as she cooed over how beautiful you were until you responded by growling at her on your 'tiger' day. As much as it is hugely girly, I did prefer your princess days because I was a little less hesitant to take you out.
I love how you have changed the face of a princess for me. That when I think of princesses and princessy things, I would think girly and weak but not anymore. I didn't want you to be girly and prissy because I'm not. I wanted you to be strong and brave but that's what princesses really are and I think you knew that. A ton of princess movies will prove that if you watch it closely. You call yourself a princess because that's how you see them. You must because you are strong and brave. You are so clever and creative. You try everything and always put in your best effort. Yes you love pink and purple but you will also add peach and aqua when telling someone your favourite colour. Yes you love drawing butterflies and flowers and all things pretty, but you always say you are so glad God made them for us to look at outside. You are so amazing at ballet as well as swimming and running and wrestling your brothers. You love your long hair but also when its in a high messy bun. You love dresses and dress ups but most days you come out of your room in shorts and a t shirt. Dance parties are your favourite and watching movies in your pj's. You look after everyone like you are their mum and your friend list is endless and full of boys and girls of all ages because you would just prefer everyone be your friend. You make us laugh by doing the craziest things because you love being crazy more than calm. People don't call you Eva Diva for no reason but life would be way less boring otherwise.
My special date with you on Friday made me wish I could do that forever because while I didn't get a single word in, I was mesmerised by you. How in just five years do you know so much? How in just one conversation over coffee have I learned so much from you who should know so little? How someone like me can often get caught up in the pressures of appearance and outer beauty can see from one little girl what true inner beauty is and how it makes a person draw in so many. For this was the moment I saw that you were completely ready for the adventure of school. The making of your dreams in a few years become a reality through the nurturing of your teachers and friends you will grow and learn with. That whatever you were going to decide you would be, whenever that moment happens, you will without a single doubt, make it happen. For your dreams are also now my dreams for you sweet Eva.
My little Eva Poppy. A special name handpicked just for you and you alone. Eva; your mum and dad's compromise between Ava and Eve that neither of us would budge on until we decided to have both. And Poppy, for one of the most very special people, once a big part of our life that you never got to meet. So for that, we took your Poppy who watches over you and his family from Heaven, and placed him in your name.
So rest and dream tonight beautiful girl. For all the courage, strength, love, kindness, joy and fun inside you will be shown to all in the next exciting chapter of you life. Take with you all the things we have taught you and you have learned yourself along the way and make room for all the new and amazing things you are about to see. Remember who you are and the type of person we have encouraged you to be. Be kind to everyone, love all, never stop learning, listen to your friends and especially those older and wiser, respect each person for who they are, never be ashamed that you love Jesus, be a leader and if you follow, follow what is right and good. Don't judge others and don't let anyone make you feel less than you are for God made you exactly as he planned and to us you are more precious and lovely than anything of this world. If anyone is unkind, show them kindness only and how strong you are as a person. Focus on making the world a better place not what you look like. For I believe the characteristics that make up inner beauty are powerful enough to make impacting changes to the world around you. Be independent but let the right kind of people help guide you and your decisions. And while being all these things is sometimes challenging and exhausting, take lots of time to reflect and relax. Enjoy your time at school and make the most of what it has to offer.
Here is to the next five years and all the ones after that because so far, these have been my favourite. Not one smile, giggle, butterfly drawing, ballet dance, song, hug, hair braiding, laying in the sun memory will ever leave me, for they are most treasured. For all the years you have clung onto me with those little fingers, it is now time to let go, just for a small part of the day and be your own kind of wonderful. Enjoy school my little Eva Poppy, your biggest fans, your mumma and daddy, will be cheering you on always, even when you don't see.
© The Realistic Mum
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